‘We love each other but can’t be together’… Yes, there are two sides of love, and this is the not-so-pretty one. The forbidden, almost impossible kind of love can hurt a person the most.
It’s when your heart is filled with love for some person, but at the same time, you’re going through the most painful heartbreak. You love them, but you know you shouldn’t, and it’s killing you inside.
Indeed, our heart has that awful habit of ignoring our mind a little too often. It’s just that no matter how hard you try and no matter how much you want it, you just can’t control it.
You can’t control your romantic emotions nor do you have the power to delete someone from your heart. However, you should know that no matter the situation, true love is always worth the fight. And, I’m here to help you come out from that battle as a winner.
We Love Each Other But Can’t Be Together: 8 Possible Reasons, With Relationship Advice
There are various reasons why two people in love can’t be together. I’ve selected the most common ones and provided them with some efficient relationship advice.
You know the saying, procrastination brings loss… So, let’s find a way to build a bridge between you and your loved one, and make things between you work.
1. We love each other but can’t be together because of distance.
I know… being in a long-distance relationship sucks. When we were dating, my husband had to move far away because of his work, and I swear, that was the most difficult year in my life.
However, we never even considered breakup as an option. We made a promise to each other that we’ll stay together no matter what, and that no distance will be able to separate us.
To make a long story short, we endured it all, and now, four years later, we’re happily married. Your love story can have the same ending, but only if you make efforts to make your long-distance relationship work.
• Understanding and regular communication are the most powerful weapon against distance
You should simply behave like you’re in a ‘normal’ relationship. Keep in touch regularly, talk and facetime with each other every day, talk about your days, plan your vacations together, find a way to keep the intimacy alive whether it’s through sexting or whatever…
Be patient and understanding above everything else. Keep in mind that distance means nothing when two people honestly love each other and want to stay together no matter what.
2. We love each other but can’t be together because of different faiths.
I always try to comfort myself that our society has overcome these faith-related issues, but unfortunately, that’s not true. These things still exist and many couples decide to break up because of their different religions.
Please don’t become one of those couples. God loves us all, and in His eyes, we’re all the same.
• It all starts and finishes with respect and acceptance
You can always agree to disagree about some things; however, you shouldn’t disrespect or completely refuse your partner’s values and beliefs. If they’re important to them, such things must be important to you, too.
In the end, different holidays come with different faiths. That means you’ll have more reason for celebrations and more reasons to be happy and surrounded by people you love.
3. We love each other but can’t be together because we’re committed to other people.
You’re deeply in love with each other, but are one or both of you married? The fact is, these things happen every day, and that’s exactly the reason why divorce exists.
However, don’t engage in any kind of relationship while you don’t end your marriage. Being in a relationship with a married man/woman is terribly difficult and almost never ends in a good way… trust me, I know it best.
• You both have to choose a side
In that decision-making process, you should ask yourself one thing and be brutally honest with the answer. Are you truly in love with each other or do you think it’s just passion or infatuation?
This might help you with the answer; 10 Crucial Differences Between Love And Infatuation.
If you have any doubts regarding the strength of your love, you might make a huge mistake by leaving your partner… a mistake that will haunt you for the rest of your life.
However, if you’re sure of what you feel for each other, then it’s unfair to lie to your life partner. You need to find the strength to leave your marriage and stand beside each other even if the whole world stands against you.
4. We love each other but can’t be together because we keep hurting each other.
Gaslighting, emotional abuse, lack of understanding and respect, manipulation, jealousy… Are these all the patterns of your relationship?
Just because you’re in love doesn’t mean you also have to be blind. It’s good that both of you are aware of your unhealthy relationship, but it’s not good that you’re thinking about giving up on your love.
If one person keeps hurting the other, then it’s unrequited love, and there is truly no point in fighting for that kind of relationship. However, if both of you are equally guilty of those mistakes, you can make your relationship work again if the willingness to put effort into it is mutual.
• Work on your relationship instead of giving up on it
Only cowards leave and give up when things become tough. The point is to stay and keep fighting.
You already made a huge step in fixing your relationship; you admitted that it’s toxic. Now, you just need to find a way to squeeze that toxicity out and make it healthy once again.
Just because you walked onto a few obstacles on your way doesn’t mean you can’t be together anymore. You can and you must for the sake of your love.
5. We love each other but can’t be together because our families don’t approve of it.
No matter how much you try to prove that your love is sincere and that you’re really made for each other, your families just won’t support your relationship.
I get why you think it would be for the best to go separate ways and move on with your own lives. They’re the people you love the most in the entire world, and it’s completely normal that their opinions matter to you that much.
However, shouldn’t your happiness be the most important thing for them? If you two make each other happy, aren’t they being unfair for standing in the way of your love?
• Having the support of your loved ones is important, but you have to decide what your priorities are
You have two choices; either let go of each other just to please your families, or go against them and fight for your love.
I agree… both of them are hard ones. However, together, you can find a way to deal with your families while, on the other hand, if you choose the first option, you might regret it for the rest of your life.
After all, they’ll have to find a way to accept you two as a couple sooner or later. I think they won’t risk losing their family members just because they don’t particularly like your life partners.
6. We love each other but can’t be together because our life goals don’t align.
It has become a common misconception today that two people in a loving partnership need to have the same or at least similar ambitions, goals, and aims for the future.
On the contrary, the whole point of a healthy relationship is to keep your independence. You can have different life goals, but you should support and help each other in achieving them.
• Compromise! It’s always better to bend a little than to break into pieces
In order to make a relationship work, you should share only one goal: to grow old together. If that is the one goal you two have in common, nothing else truly matters.
Don’t let your selfish desires ruin what you two have. I’m not saying you should give up on your goals and dreams, but by cultivating acceptance and respect, you will be able to find common ground… the ground to build your future together.
7. We love each other but can’t be together because of the big age gap.
You two are in love, but the huge age gap between you is causing you real problems, and you think it’ll never allow you to be happy together.
Of course, it’s not only age, but all the differences and different life experiences that come with it… on top of that, I assume your families are strongly against your relationship, right?
Well, let me tell you one thing: none of those things matter because you’re looking at it from a very wrong perspective…
• You should see it as an opportunity; not as an obstacle
Most couples are terrified of their differences because they think it’ll ruin their relationship sooner or later. Unfortunately, they’ve no idea how wrong they truly are.
Those differences can actually bring two people closer together. Differences allow us to find out and learn so many things from each other, which can only result in strengthening the bond between partners.
After all, love doesn’t care for age, faith, race, and such things… actually, when two people truly love each other, nothing else matters except that love.
8. We love each other but can’t be together because of his/her infidelity.
You were in a loving relationship, but all of a sudden, your fairytale was crushed because your partner cheated on you?
Now, you know you still love them and they claim they love you, too, and how it was all just a mistake they don’t plan to repeat ever again. However, do you think that you aren’t able to leave their mistakes behind, but at the same time, you think you can’t leave them behind either?
To be honest, choosing between forgiving a cheater and letting go of them is a tough call, but you’ll have to decide what to do soon. I hope this will help you make the right decision…
• Forgiveness is the highest form of love
There is nothing wrong with forgiving your partner for cheating on you. However, it’s only if you’re doing it for the right reason… if you’re doing it because you really love them and see that they honestly regret their mistake.
Mistakes have become a huge part of our lives, and the truth is, no one is immune to making mistakes, especially when it comes to our love life.
On the other hand, if you really can’t find the strength to forgive your partner for betraying you in such a way, you really shouldn’t continue that relationship. It’ll be a deeply unhealthy relationship, and sooner or later, you will break up and it’ll be for good.
What Do You Do When You Love Someone But Can’t Be Together?
Being in this situation can seriously impact your mental health, especially if you don’t know how to cope with it. Here are a few tips that will help you keep your own sanity during these hard times in your life.
1. Stay realistic and see things as they are.
Don’t get me wrong… you should have the faith that one day, you’ll overcome obstacles and finally be together. However, what you shouldn’t do is keep living in hope.
You can spend some time there, but sooner or later, you’ll have to step into reality and stay there. No matter how tough or unfair life becomes, you have no other choice but to live it.
You have to keep that realistic point of view for the sake of your own sanity. Living in a bubble may work for some time, but once you step out of it, you’ll be facing the most painful heartbreak of your life.
2. Accept that some people simply aren’t meant to be together.
Some things are out of your control and you just need to accept it. No matter how much you want something to work out, God has other plans for you, and that’s something you can’t change.
Some people, despite the strong feelings they have for each other, are simply not meant to be or stay together forever.
You can either accept it and focus on your healing or you can keep living in a lie and keep hoping for the impossible to happen. To be honest, both choices are difficult, but the first one is far less painful indeed.
3. Deal with your emotions in a healthy way.
Don’t even think about suppressing your emotions. You’re separated from the person you love… this is not the time to pretend you’re strong.
You may think that bottling up your emotions helps you ease the pain. But, the truth is, it’ll only prolong your heartbreak because sooner or later, those emotions will find a way out.
Find a way to control that roller coaster of overwhelming emotions you’re currently dealing with. Cry if you have the need to, break something if it’ll help you with the anger that is eating you inside. Don’t let your emotions consume you… find a healthy way to deal with them.
4. Confide in your best friend.
Sharing your sorrows with your best friends and your family members is the only therapy you need. Even if they can’t offer you advice about what you should do, they will be there for you and they will try everything just to see you smile again.
It’s perfectly normal that you can’t deal with all of this alone. Allow your loved ones to help and comfort you.
This is really not the time for you to act like you’re so brave and all of that nonsense. Trust me… when it comes to love, we’re all weak and we all need help.
5. No matter how much you love them, you should always love yourself more.
The only person who will be with you for the rest of your life is yourself. That’s the only fact, and it’s time to remind yourself of that.
You should never love another person more than you love yourself. Always remember one thing; you’re the only person you can’t live without.
6. If there is no point in fighting for it, find the strength to let go.
If it’s really pointless to keep fighting for it, you need to gather the strength and courage to move on. Let go of what can’t be and save yourself.
It’s pointless to hold onto something you know can never work. It can only keep breaking your heart, every single day, piece by piece…
7. Believe in the power of time.
Maybe they aren’t your soulmate after all. Maybe they are, but you met at the wrong time.
Time will tell. You have no other option but to give it time and see what will happen. If you’re meant to be together, you’ll cross paths in the future, and you’ll never separate again. On the other hand, if they aren’t your destiny, time will bring you peace and healing.
Can You Be In Love Without Being Together?
Unfortunately, you can. In fact, the pain and the longing can intensify the love you feel for them even if they’re taken away from you forever.
Even if many bad things happen between you, even if they’re far away from you, even if you decided to part ways years ago, you can still be in love with them like the very first time you meet them.
Whether we like it or not, love isn’t something that can be controlled. Only our heart has the privilege to decide who it’ll let in and how long that person will stay there.
The button for switching off your emotions does not and will never exist. The heart wants what it wants, and there is absolutely nothing you can do about it.
We Love Each Other But Can’t Be Together Quotes
You can also seek solace in these powerful ‘we love each other but can’t be together’ quotes.
1. “A flame may love a snowflake, but they can never be together without each harming the other.” – Chris Colfer
2. “I don’t cry because we’ve been separated by distance, and for a matter of years. Why? Because for as long as we share the same sky and breathe the same air, we’re still together.” – Donna Lynn Hope
3. “My heart and mind are telling me two different things. My heart is telling me that this is a great love. My mind is telling me that there is a difference between real love and forbidden love. My mind is also telling me that I shouldn’t want to be with you.” – Cassandra Clare
4. “I love you more than I could ever describe, but our time has come and gone. I don’t want to end things like this, and I don’t give up hope. Maybe someday, we will meet again and it will be back like it used to.” – Unknown
5. “Even though we were never supposed to be together, I can’t be with anyone else, no matter the consequences.” – Nicole Gulla
6. “And then, when there is nothing else between us but love, we can begin to find a way to truly be together.” – S.J. Watson
7. “Our forbidden love was never meant to survive. I had no idea life could be this hard without you with me. I see clearly now that we weren’t meant to be together. The love we have is a forbidden love.” – John West
‘We love each other but can’t be together’ is the sentence I hate the most because nothing is impossible with true love. I believe with all my heart that love is the most powerful force in the universe, and the only one that’s capable of making real wonders.
Sometimes, you need exactly that… a wonder. On the other hand, sometimes, a bit of faith combined with mutual effort is more than enough in order to make a healthy relationship work.
If it’s truly impossible for you to be together, then you must know that it isn’t true love after all. And, that will make the process of moving on a lot easier for you.
One day, you’ll meet your soulmate; the person who’ll show you what true love really is. At that moment, it’ll be perfectly clear to you why this relationship couldn’t survive.